According to the academic book titled ‘Principles of Persuasion’ by Robert Cialdini, Cialdini boldly defines these principles controversially as ‘weapons of influence’. One of the weapons fortunate enough, or not, to have entered the list is reciprocity. The boundary of this ‘weapon’ is when one person is offered or given something, it is innate in human nature to feel compelled to return the favour, lest settling with a prickling and uncomfortable feeling that never dissipates.

In the food & beverage (F&B) industry, it might seem reciprocity is the wheel that drives the vehicle of progress. Restaurants and hotels promote chefs and menus by providing complimentary media tastings. After which, the food writer does a piece on it. Is it good, or is it bad? Is this reeked with avenues for this unspoken practice to be taken advantage of? Let us put things in perspectives.

Reciprocity in this form propels the F&B industry. Mutual favour can facilitate and drive the vehicle and wheels of progress and advancements. Because honestly, one cannot do without the other – that is the basis of reciprocity to work. The F&B industry cannot fully bloom without the publicity and advertising of the media, and the media needs their very subject matter to write about – which are the restaurants, hotels, chefs and menus. There is nothing wrong with writing a feature piece, and there is nothing wrong with restaurants rolling out constant complimentary tastings for the media. On one condition though. The terms of reciprocity are reasonable, understood and accepted by dual parties.

Should this balance of scale tip, that is when this weapon of reciprocity becomes detrimental, and fail to fulfill its function of furthering the industry. So what are these unwritten or unspoken terms in the F&B industry? As a feature writer for a culinary trade publication, I receive invites for media tastings and they often invite two writers. That is unspoken, because it is miserable to for one to go alone. Restaurants are not miserly, or unreasonable, and they will make gracious concessions. So it is alright, if I ask to bring along a fellow writer, perhaps the one who is not exposed enough, to join me. They usually relent.

And in turn, what is this mutual benefit that we reciprocate for these restaurants or the hotels? The piece of article we write, be it editorially or digitally, tends to be positive, conscious to highlight the strengths - a piece that carries a denoted tone of celebration and commendation. If the writer did not like a particular dish, he would be selective in the way it is structured, so that it does not exude a tone of criticism.

But what is this commotion with Brad Lau, the name behind the now infamous ladyironchef? Now, though terms of reciprocity are defined, it is not quantified. What do I mean by this? It seemed Lau pulled that stunt because he might have semmingly, possibly wrongfully also, interpreted his favour to be bigger than what is offered on the other side. ‘I am a famous food blogger with a respectable following. I had made such a name for myself that people not only know me, they internalise what I critic. The publicity I am providing in return for your lunch tasting is more worthy in value and size.
Hence, I feel I have to right to make certain demands’. That might have been Lau’s thought process. That is why he did not feel any qualms of biting off more of the reciprocity-pie, maybe because he felt he baked a bigger size of the pie anyway.

Kelvin Koh, food blogger of Time Façade, shared similar sentiments. “The fact that he brought 2 additional guests and expected the restaurant to waive the bill when nothing was confirmed is a big ‘no no’ in my humble opinion. Regardless of status, a food blogger should not expect the restaurant to waive off his friends bill.” No one is here to point fingers. Asiacuisine.com knows the internal workings of this industry, from both sides, so we present it on a silver platter for all. But what we sought from this debatable topic, is questions to be churning in your heads by the end of this article, not answers or opinions on the ladyironchef saga. How was this problem allowed to materialise? Where were the loopholes? The F&B industry will continue to strive, I’m sure of it, but what are the looming problems that may happen too, with everything that is going on today?